Stop hoarding nuts
Sometimes we go a little overboard.
Before I dive in, I have to say I just love squirrels. I know they are little tree rats, but I had to watch them for a biology class in college (for months) and now they hold a special place in my heart. You should love them too. That is all.
Back to my point: In my room is used to have a goals board. On it I had two simple goals.
Snatch 170 pounds
Clean and Jerk 205 pounds
But what you couldn’t see on that board was when those goals were set and how many million others things I tried to do at the same time…
Somewhere along the way I lost focus...
My "goals board" was a sad remnant of when I tried to do 7,000 new things before I was ready for 2 new things. I set these goals when I decided to fix my diet, stretch every day, do extra accessory work 3 times a week, read my bible more, be more present with my family, and play guitar, write, read, oh yeah and breathe every now and again.
WHAT A JOKE.
Ask me how many of these resolutions or changes I kept. Go ahead, just ask me. Nevermind, do not even waste your breath. I will tell you. None of them. You heard me right. None. Now I know what you are thinking, "Uh, why am I reading a blog about failure? This is not very fun to read." I did not keep any of these goals or resolutions because I never truly owned them and made them mine. I saw what everyone else was doing and I got idea ADD/ADHD combined with OCD. I was like a strung out squirrel on some illicit substance trying to gather up and grab every nut I could find. Completely unfocused on what was happening, but lazer focused on getting "things" done.
Picture this with me:
I am a squirrel on some kind of addicting drug - out of my mind.
I see a fellow squirrel gathering up their nuts and I want to be just like them.
I think to myself, that squirrel sure looks busy and important, well I want to be important, I will just do what they are doing!
I am running around gathering up all of these nuts making all of these plans for what I can do with them all - come winter.
Every time I pick up one nut, I drop a different one, and then lose sight of the one I dropped, but I only hold the next one for a short time, long enough to set my sights on a new nut, that I will pursue, obtain, and eventually lose...
Before I know it, I am exhausted. I have less nuts than when I began my hunt, and I am completely dissatisfied.
I cannot be controlled!!!!!
Allow me to explain this nut metaphor.
Each nut for me represents a dream, or an idea that I see someone else achieving and therefore I want it for myself. Because that dream looks appealing, fulfilling, and it seduces me into trying to find a way to achieve it. But what if I am not ready to chase that dream, and more importantly what if that dream is not meant for me. What if my omniscient Creator has a different plan for me. Yet, here I am too busy running around chasing all these other nuts. Obtaining thing after thing, with this loose and meaningless grasp. I slowly realize I was never meant to hold these things. I created the need for them, the void if you will, and left myself unfulfilled when I could not hold onto them. Are you following me?
Drop the nuts Lauren.
Every now and again I catch myself in this crazy squirrel mode and I have to take a step back. Remember that goals board? I have actually smashed those goals, months ago I smashed them, and I never changed that goals board. Why? Because I lost focus.
I was too worried about what everyone else was doing.
Read that line again. I was focused on the EXTERNAL of others. Not even on my own, personal, present, external situation. But instead the situations and experiences of others. My mind was occupied on so many other stupid, senseless things that I did not see the goals that were being achieved right in front of my face. I did not celebrate my success, I did not thank my Creator, and in turn I created more work for myself. All the while making myself fall shorter still.
A renewed mind.
I am now 5 weeks away from my next lifting competition. I am vowing 3 simple things to myself. Not 3,000 things, but instead, count them with me, one, two, three simple things, before this next competition.
BE PRESENT
I will honor my gifts and my training daily, doing what I am told by my coach and celebrating each lift and session because I am blessed to do what I do. (BE Present)
BE DISCIPLINED FOR THE LONG TERM GOAL
I will honor my body and what I put into my body must be honorable. (I cut weight for meets and therefore I have a considerable amount of weight to lose in these next 5 weeks, I have been a glutton and it needs to stop)
LOVE DEEPLY
I will stay centered on the things that matter, which are not things at all but are the people in my life. (Time with Family and Friends, Time with God, Time with myself to grow, to learn, to push myself to new limits.)
I challenge you to renew your mind. No matter who we are or what we are working towards we can always take a step back and renew our mind. Stop chasing and start being today.
Until next time friends,
Initiate Reactions in life. Reactions of change.